I finally accomplished it by leaving the country.  Usually I take a side trip to give my wife some "quality time" with her family.  In the past I have visited Romania, Turkey, and nearly everywhere in Bulgaria.  This year I spent a week in Macedonia.  Macedonia is pretty similar to Bulgaria in many ways --- and many Bulgarians will insist that Macedonia should still be a part of Bulgaria, as it was in the distant past before Ottoman occupation of both areas for 500 years. 

I visited the capital, Skopje, hiked to the remote Treskovec Monastery near Prilep, and then finished the week on Lake Ohrid.  The thing I remember most about the trip was how badly the Angels got screwed by the umpires in Fenway Park in an ESPN Wednesday Night Baseball game I was able to catch in a Prilep restaurant on satellite delay (I am an Angels fan, but that in no way colors my assessment of the umpiring ... this cartoon sums it up accurately:  http://www.halosheaven.com/2009/9/18/1036319/a-few-good-men).  I spent the better part of the rest of the trip worrying about how on Earth the Angels will break the Curse of Donnie Moore and finally beat the Red Sox in the postseason.

Baseball worries aside, it was a pleasant journey.  Bulgaria is changing rapidly since its ascension into the EU.  Prices are rising and the infrastructure is modernizing.  Clean bathrooms with toilet paper can now be found on occasion.  My son saw a 3-D movie.  There's no way those pre-1989 Bulgarian Commies could have ever made a decent 3-D movie (or ever would allowed an American one to be shown).  Beer is an area where the Bulgarians are sorely lacking.  There are dozens of locally-made brands, all of which taste like a variant of Keystone Ice.  Luckily, I can buy Guinness in the sparkling new Bulgarian supermarkets, for just $4.00/can.  Even with the side trip to Macedonia, there's always a lot of down time with the Bulgarian family, and I used to opportunity to write several new songs for my bluegrass band.  Come out and see the Oly Mountain Boys this fall and hear the fruits of the labor!

So we're back, and Monday I'll be writing settlement conference statements instead of banjo breakdowns.  Assuming I can settle down and focus with the ALDS starting on Tuesday in Anaheim.